You can have conversations IRL that nobody will monitor or have any record of. I swear, people these days have forgotten how to exist in the real world.

I wouldn’t call moderated internet communities a panopticon. You can opt out at any time, which is pretty antithetical to the definition of a panopticon.

What’s the better way?

There are lots of great answers but I see a key point missing - it’s not necessarily about making realistic sex scenes, it’s about making sex scenes that look good on camera.

No, dogs have no concept of gender identity.

Unlikely. They have data centers in several locations all over the world, and there are countless backup copies downloaded onto personal devices everywhere.

I disagree with your corollary. We don’t know the rules of the universe that our simulated universe resides in. We could be the first layer or an infinitely lower layer, and there would be no way of knowing.