Edit: “getting closer to marriage” is about the whole journey starting from being completely single
Edit: if this shower thought is too confusing to be useful to you, then here is a quote that gives some of the same guidance, is simpler, less philosophical, but less broad: “Don’t waste your time chasing butterflies. Mend your garden, and the butterflies will come” - Mario Quintana
The narrow view you’re talking about is bad for success in dating, so it’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about things like working on yourself, having your own life, being an interesting person, becoming more confident, etc.
Edit: i forgot to mention that getting married and having a family doesn’t guarantee that you reach full earthly potential, because there’s a lot of good things to do