I grew up in a rough household. We had holes punched into the walls, doors torn off the frames, my siblings and I saw regular abuse, and as a kid I constantly felt like I had to do things to keep the family held together.
I felt like I was treated by my parents as a servant. They constantly threw away anything I remotely liked, and continued stacking chores on me, especially those that weren’t my own mess. They gave me the boot shortly before graduation, and long story short, I finally got a place for myself after years of effort.
I just can’t shake this feeling though that things are painfully unfair. Like you escape hell after all these years, and the first thing expected from you is to find a job. I get it, you need to work to make money and pay the rent and bills but… why me? Why after all this time of putting up with the crap you have instead of being a kid are you just expected to step in line like everyone else when you never got that opportunity to find who you are and simply enjoy life for what it is.
I don’t know, is this lazy? It’s not that I don’t want to work, but why can’t I be a kid? Why can’t I have some time to reclaim what all was taken from me and have some time to enjoy myself rather than grasp at random short memories I had before I was 5? Everyone else got it, why not me?
I don’t know, am I just rambling about nothing?
Personal opinion here, I think the world is inherently unfair. Fairness is something we give to ourselves and each other, but the world itself only has its natural laws to follow.
If you can find some childhood happiness even as you grow older, you should enjoy it. It is a right we all have or are entitled to demand.
I’d say the typical childhood is a fantasy, not everyone is the same. There’s plenty of suffering and neglect to go around and I’m sure you’ll find plenty of friends here who have gone through similar things.
It’s good to ramble and relieve the pent-up stress once in a while, but also to seek a way of resolving the issues to stop them from reoccurring.